My mom said to me once that I should stop being upset when things and people dont me my expectations. Her reasoning is two fold 1. everyone on this earth is imperfect and will mess up so you will wear yourself out worrying about things you cannot change
2. If they are your expectations then it is your problem when things don't pan out they way you think they should.
So, lately this has been wearing me out, upside down, backwards, to the point that I am standing on my head, clenching my fists and taking "momma bear" to places people have never seen. It's not a good sign when Momma Bear shows up. Its not nice, and its well really just not pretty.
Momma Bear showed up a few months ago stomping her feet and doing everything she could to make things right for her little. But, God had different plans. My hope was diverted from people that I had put faith in to His sovereignty where my faith should have been...
I have a husband who looks for God's will everywhere. So when something isnt quite right, maybe it's not kicking and screaming that will fix it. Perhaps, it shouldn't be fixed because it's just right. OK. Deep breath, step back. When there is so much evil out there, you have to think good will prevail even if I never see it...(right?)
I will have my little with me a bit more this Spring. Next Fall Joy Buckets will be in school everyday of the week. God has given us so much, and through what I thought was a huge misstep by people I think have failed my Joy....it really may just be a giant gift. I am getting my Joy back in so many ways.
It's Spring break. You may not know it because we are still here and for the most part uneventful. My expectations again, grossly deviated from His plan. It hit me today, and now I am sad because it is Thursday. We have been in town and I have tried to plan little outings and get togethers with some precious friends...only to have my littles forget their manners, fight, and literally drag me into a full on battle of the wills. This has been crazy to me. It's almost like I thought I would suddenly turn into Mary Poppins and my children would be the Van Trapps (the part where they march to the whistle)...HA. NO.
But my expectations are bothering me. Not the littles.
I have said it before...my problem...PERSPECTIVE. I am blessed beyond measure, by grace alone I can sit her and wait for my littles to get up so we can go to the park. Perhaps I should leave the expectations behind at the park...I mean who has time for creating more problems for themselves?